Sky Valley Messenger

What happens when a special needs child sees one of his fellow students do something that causes those around to laugh. In Noah’s case he thinks the act done by his fellow student makes him popular with his peers. That means it’s something to be mimicked, even if it is inappropriate.  Noah may not be aware of the meaning of the act, or in some cases a phrase. Noah may repeat the phrase or mimic the act, and if it doesn’t result in the desired or hoped for response, he will do it over and over, hoping for that popular reaction or recognition, and acceptance by his peers. Noah, of course, has no idea why no one is laughing, he just keeps trying anyway, until someone complains. Eventually Noah is shunned for his behavior. Noah has no idea why he’s in trouble for something that others were applauded for. He has no idea why he is now being shunned by those that he just wants as friends.

Noah doesn’t understand, and it’s easier to shun than to explain. Society has been shunning special needs children for eons. It’s easy, everyone does it. Just tell them to go away, you don’t want to be friends with them. Parents tell their kids to stay away from them, they’re dangerous, don’t play with them. They will go so far as to tell the parents of a special needs child to keep their child away from their child. They don’t want to help the child understand what is not appropriate, they just want you to keep your child away from theirs.

My neighbor is that way. We were called, after 10 pm, and informed that our child behaved inappropriately with theirs and that they don’t want Noah around their child anymore. Noah won’t understand, but he will know that he behaved wrongly and won’t know why. He’ll be terribly sorry, sad, and disappointed. Mostly he just won’t understand why he can’t continue to play with their child. Why shunned? How do you explain to any child, let alone a special needs child why they are being shunned?

It’s easy to just shun a child.